How to Deal with the Manager from Hell.
Earth, it seems, is populated with denizens from Hell. Dramatic, not?
Words have become cheap.
“From Hell.”
“The Devil himself.”
That balding little guy in the corner office, sporting an old-fashioned tie — is he truly the “Prince of Darkness?”
It’s your responsibility to set some boundaries when you feel yourself slipping into cliché territory.
Skip the “Pit of Hell” for a second and try some of the following phrases:
Managers are unapproachable. Some overlook your best efforts, while others are rude and condescending.
Once you wield more descriptive words, the potential for agency swings in your favor.
It’s only possible to deal with something when you know the game.
Would you wager high stakes and walk into a dark room knowing only, “We will be playing cards”? Of course not.
You want to know which game it will be. All card games have different rules. Preparation depends on knowledge.
The “devil” metaphor is powerful, but it can inflate perception. This is precisely why people use it.
The downside is over-strategizing and creating a fictional environment.
Think along the lines of systems, not reactions.
So, you’ve defined the Devil, making it all observational, not reactional.
The game is defined. What does the environment look like?
Define yourself: What triggered you in that environment when you had to face that individual?
You want practical ideas now. Here goes:
If the “devil” is real (hostile, manipulative), stop engaging everywhere. Reduce chaos in your life by steering clear of their playground — when you are able to. Ask relevant questions: Am I writing things down, communicating clearly? Do I still attend all the optional meetings where I can be slammed?
In cards, weak hands can still win with position. Speak less, be precise. Count to 10, or 100, when provoked. Reaction can make you lose the game.
Don’t fight stronger entities head-on unless you can afford the loss.
Check the mirror again. Was the game really rigged that time, or did your reaction lead to a problem?
Know when to leave the table. Not all games are winnable.
That’s it — your practical field-guide entries.
The obvious quotable and screenshot-worthy part for social media is this: “Know when to leave the table. Not all games are winnable.”
Be sure to add “- Matt le Roux” below it.
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I think if you are having manager issues like this then find a new job and escalate this up.
No.
In a perfect world, you ‘just leave.’
In reality, where almost everyone lives, you will need to manage confrontation — and even conflict with yourself, your definitions of what is happening, and a logical assessment of what’s actually happening.
‘Just leaving’ is also problematic when you realize: people are similar all over. The same dynamic often follows you to the next table.
I mentioned the gist of what you said, leave the table, and know when.
You skipped straight to the exit strategy and missed the whole architecture of the piece.
But the gist of what I said, was to first deconstruct the cliches that keep people trapped.
And that is important… The Devil is often a personal fiction in a workplace, and not an agreed-upon truth!