Fear changes when the CFO walks in

The guy from the warehouse turned pale.

He didn’t need a psychologist to diagnose him. The guy was falling apart in real time. He was doing okay, on a roll, until the CFO entered the room. Instantly, his speech disintegrated.

I’ve seen those scenarios unfold many times. Mr. Warehouse faltered not because a general fear of speaking had appeared, but because the CFO walked in and the cost of making a mistake went up.

I’ve been that guy — sweating through a shirt in front of a boss who barely looked up.
Warehouse dude was also that person. Later, he started paying attention to the pattern.

The fear wasn’t showing up everywhere. It showed up around certain people.
Different people produced different reactions.
Sometimes the fear weakened. Sometimes it vanished. Sometimes it stayed exactly where it was.

“Just breathe” never helped me much. And repeating “Just be confident” is equally useless.

Those standard self-help rituals rarely moved me to a better space. Fear isn’t always a malfunction. Sometimes it’s reporting a change in conditions. Sometimes it’s telling you that the cost, real or imagined, has gone up.

In a previous post I mentioned the fear of getting mugged.
The same person who walks into a boardroom without hesitation might avoid a dark alley at midnight.

But the fear doesn’t disappear. It just moves to another room and waits.